What happened since november, december, january, february, march....almost 5 months blog ni sunyi tanpa berita. But actually a lot had happened to me...
Celebrated my 30th birthday with my my husband & my daania on the 26th. Just a simple celebration, bought a simple cake (dah boring dengan kek secret recipe...huhu), snap some photos, makan2 kek...and walla. Ooo, and i did get a birthday present .... it was an Ipod, a white one...huuu, thanks dear
I was pregnant! the day that i visited my Gynea it was already 6 weeks... we were so blessed, felt like a birthday present for me, and of course Daania was the most happy one! Started my morning sickness....tu yg blog sunyi jek.huhu
This time my pregnancy was so much different, my morning sickness was severe and i constantly bleed...I was even admitted due to severe bleeding, but my baby was ok. My gynea detected i had cervical prolapse and that was the caused of my bleeding. Nothing can be done at that moment i just have to bare with it...it was ok for me as long my baby is ok
Celebrated mr.Radin's 31st Birthday. I surprised him with a Nikon Birthday Cake and for the first time, brought him to Marche @ The Curve.
The next day, i lost his wallet during our visit to Amcorp Mall.. kesian my hubby. A great day before that, a not so great day the day after :/
On the 23rd, my water broke on my 17 weeks of pregnancy, and the most unwanted news delivered by my doc.."tak boleh buat ape, baby tak boleh survive..we just have to wait till its hearbeat stop..hopefully die kluar sendiri" from the ultrasound result my uri was totally dried. At that moment, in front of my doc.. i was really blured, and dont know how to respon, i just iyerkan jek what he said. Than on my way to the ward, than it hits me... i burst into tears, i cried even louder when my husband hugged me... That night i couldnt sleep thinking of my baby, and still prayed hard for miracle.
The next day, my husband and daania came to visit before pegi JB sebab ada wedding job, i know he was so worried leaving me alone and so reluctant to go... but i understand, it's his job.. luckily my parents in law do came to visit, and my dad came to KL on that day. On the 24th morning, did an ultrasound and my baby still ada heartbeat, so nothing much can be done and i went back to my bed and rest...i just dont know what to expect at that time. Around 3pm... i started to have contraction and it was getting severe from time to time. Memang rasa macam nak bersalin...around 8pm, i was alone on my bed....the contraction was so severe and i felt like a bucket of blood and something solid came out..... and when the sister(nurse) came to check, she told me the baby is out. I requested to have a look at my baby.... it was a gurl, weight at 200gm and 6inches long, physically my baby dah sempurna....but she's gone. At that time i was truly redha for what happened.... terfikir juga... maybe this's the best for both of us as i did have few complications during this pregnancy.. I believe that Allah have better plans for us..InsyaAllah.
I followed my dad balik JB to buried my baby. Alhamdulillah, we managed to buried her next to my Arwah Mummy... thanks to org kubur for being an old friend to my parents, he even said something that realy touched " takpe, nanti boleh teman atok die" :'(
As for now.... besides redha for what happened to us, sometimes i do cried bile teringat balik... almost everyday. Naluri ibu i guess... physically im recovering, but emotionally not yet i guess... InsyaAllah i will. Thanks to doas, well wishers and support from relatives and friends.
At this moment still on my MC. My doc gave me 2 weeks MC untill this 7th...(not sure if its enough..hmm) Last thursday, my husband brought me to stay a night at a hotel, just to relax aka menenangkan jiwa... we stayed at Royal Chulan hotel. Wish to had a few days break kat mane2 resort sebenarnye, but im still tak sehat and weak, so in KL pun jadilah. Nak stay lame2 hubby ada wedding job at kelantan plak. It was a great stay there and our rezeki, they even upgraded our room from deluxe to royal club without additional cost...Alhamdulillah (mcm paham2 jek diorg ni yg kitorg tgh berduka...huhu) ....
to my hubby, thanks dear for taking care of me, tolong jaga daania, jaga rumah since my morning sickness started untill now... hope we'll be a stronger and better person. I kept on holding to this sms by my cousin kak yaya if i feel down.. "...bb will b in Jannah n she'll b waiting for u......dis shows that Allah sayang nana n die mduga hamba2Nya yg tpilih" InsyaAllah... Amin
p.s. All photos are hasil rembat from my hubby's fb, tq dear :D